You've got your work cut out for you here, mayonnaise.
Burger King has made great reforms in the past few years, in case you haven't noticed. First, the election of its first Burger Prime Minister freed its citizens from the absolute monarchy that had ruled the restaurant for decades. Second, it created a veggie burger.
Eva: I wonder where they got the vegetarian pink slime.
Miles: I do have to hand it to Burger King, its food-shame substitute feels almost exactly like the real thing.
Long John Silver's Big Catch platter will net you 33 grams of trans fats in one meal.
Credit Courtesy of Clare Politano / Center for Science in the Public Interest
Seafood is generally considered a more healthful choice when dining out — but not if you're battering and deep-frying it and serving it up with hush puppies and onion rings.
And that is precisely why the folks at the Center for Science in the Public Interest, a nutrition and health policy watchdog group, have named Long John Silver's new "Big Catch" meal the worst restaurant meal in America.
Good morning, I'm David Greene with health advice from Russia.
Gennady Onishchenko, the country's chief sanitary inspector, is encouraging food patriotism. Translation: More borscht - cut the meals at McDonald's. The fast food chain is popular in many Russian cities. But Mr. Onishchenko had more to say. To beat the summer heat, he said people should just get to work early, rather than wear, quote, "spotted little pants that stop above the knees." We think he's referring to shorts.
Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today not to mourn the nine-patty T-Rex Burger, but to celebrate its life. It was pulled this week, far too young, from the menu of a rogue Manitoba Wendy's that served it to two or three people a day. It is survived by the few people who ate it and survived.
Said a Wendy's spokesperson: "For obvious reasons, Wendy's ... neither condones nor promotes the idea of anyone consuming a nine-patty hamburger in one sitting."